Over the years I have mediated numerous cases where one spouse is gay and the other spouse is not gay. I have not mediated a case where there is a gay couple. It is interesting to note that although the couple usually indicates that the reason for the divorce is because a spouse is gay, it is not usually the reason for the divorce. More often than not the couple is getting divorced for the same reasons that most couples get divorced. If the couple is getting divorced because of the gay issue, it is usually a more positive divorce. There have been two recent articles on this issue.
The Arizona Star published an AP story on April 16, 2008, entitled "Married Gays in Uncharted Divorce Waters." The article says that "Gay couples who still live in the state where they got hitched can split up with little difficulty: The laws in those states include divorce or dissolution procedures for same-sex couples. But gay couples who have moved to another state are running into trouble." See the entire article at http://www.azstarnet.com/allheadlines/234596.php
The Sunday, April 20,2008m New York Times also had an article by Torrie Osborn, entitled "The Joy of Marriage Was Ours, for a While." See the entire article at http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/20/fashion/20love.html?ex=1366516800&en=1739614785191b61&ei=5124&partner=permalink&exprod=permalink. Ms Osborn says, "our hard-fought rights of domestic partnership required lawyers and legal proceedings to undo it, just like for straight people. And I am grateful for those laws, as they are meant to protect those like me who, in the end, find themselves to be the financially disadvantaged partner. I couldn’t help but note the irony that all my fighting for 30 years for gay civil rights had come down to ... paperwork." She goes on to say that "A year has passed since I was forced to experience the dark side of committing to a legally binding union. But the bright side, for me, has been its safety net — divorce equality. And with steady help from my friends, I was able to stay upright on the horror-ride of grief and ultimately come through stronger and more whole. I have even discovered a new joy stirring in my soul like the sweet eye of a violet; it emerged from the stillness that follows grief."
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